I want to have my cupcake, and eat it too!!

I think this is gonna be the name of my book. I think it is kind of fitting. Today i am filled with so many thoughts, worries, doubts, excitements, and the list could go on and on. I just got back from my bible study and there are so many feelings inside me right now. I am so excited to be going on the journey that i am with such an open heart. I can honestly say that this is the first time in my life that i am feeling just free and open to what God has in store for me. I am nervous about the support group on Saturday. Will anyone show up? Will a hundred people show up? Will I be able to help anyone? It is just kind of stressful to put it all together but in an exciting way, if that makes sense? I am still struggling so much with getting up in the morning. I'm telling you my body just does not function until at least 10. Even if I am awake earlier than that i promise you don't want to talk to me cause chances are i will just give you a look and a one word response that will make you feel like an idiot. I know that is so awful but it is my truth. I admit it and apologize for anyone that has ever experienced or will experience my morning wrath. I am off to Starbucks to try and have a moment of thoughtlessness?? Is that even a word? If it's not, it should be!