Sick

I'm sick and not the cool kind. My whole body hurt yesterday and I was sick all night long. I was waking up every hour to get sick and then at about 4 it was every two hours. It's kind of frustrating because i was just getting over a sinus infection. My blood sugar was sky high! It makes me wonder if i will ever be ok. Have I already done too much damage to my body? It hurts a lot. Physically my whole body feels like a really bad heardache and then I have little sharp pains at random spoys every five seconds. These pains are horibble. It;s the kind of pain that makes you jump. Mentally i feel completely exhausted. I feel like no matter what I do it won't ever be ok. I feel like a crazy person because I'm an emotional wreck. One day I am so happy, the next i just don't even want to go on. I want to quit. I would rather be dead than do this everyday. I had a doctors appointment yesterday and she asked my if i was depressed or if I needed to be medicated. I was immediately like no, I get out of bed everyday. I still enjoy things. I don't want to be doped up on something all day long. My brother used to be pretty heavy into drugs. We had a conversation once and he said that one of the reasons he did drugs was because he just didn't want to feel anymore. I thought this was so sad. His life was so bad that he just didn't want to feel anything. I now understand what he meant. I have great moments, great friends, a great family. What more could I ask for, right?